27 May 2008

that's it.


dear friends and fellow bloggers,

i think i officially weigh the most i've ever weighed in my life. i'm really not kidding, and i'm not writing this so that you will all leave a nice comment that says, "oh give me a break, you are not fat." i agree with you. i'm not fat. but i'm definitely not what i used to be either, and i think i've finally had it. the reasons i'm posting about this are personal, and are ones that will allow me to check my blog daily and see that i, jenna vela, have physically written (...typed) that i WILL stop at nothing to get in enough shape in order to start feeling good about myself again. no, no, i am not going on some crazy diet. no, no, i will not spend 4 hours at the gym. BUT, i will be managing myself a little better. this includes: getting better sleep. spending more than an hour at the gym, but not live there so that i end up having arms like madge (she is way too manly for me). eating six meals a day, and breakfast will be my main focus. no more cheese (i have a serious addiction, and cheese ain't low-fat). everytime i want to dip my little hand into my bag of nestle chocolate chips, i am INSTEAD going to guzzle a huge glass of water. if i have the urge to make cookies with those little chocolate chips, then i will make them, eat one, and then give the rest away. i will read my scriptures more often. i WILL sign up for my independent study classes and i will get A's in them. i will treat my husband like a king and just CHILL out (because let's be honest, sometimes i really am a little too sensitive). and finally, i will NEVER cut my hair again...at least for three more years. and i will somehow be strong enough to make it through the awkward stages (which is where my hair and i currently reside). and so....
i think all of these things will allow me to feel better about myself, because right now i'm feeling a little awkward about me. all of these things, i promise to you and to myself. thank you for the love and the support.

16 comments:

Ani said...

If this makes you feel any better, 2 weeks ago I weighed almost 200 pounds. Yes, that is a 2 in front of two zeros.
But, good for you. You are great with setting goals. I may join you. I love the hair cutting one. Not to be mean, but you suck at not cutting your hair. You have been growing your hair out since I met you 4 year ago. I LOVE YOU! You can do it!

McKell and John said...

You're adorable and I love your short hair. Good luck to ya!

Megano said...

Jenna!! Good for you!! You give me motivation to do better! I wish I was out there so we could work out together... but alas I am here working out with a loud oh so LOUD, very buff lady that corrects me on EVERYTHING I do... from what weights I'm lifting, to how I should be eating.. oh and did I mention I HAVE NO IDEA who she is? I guess you can't have it all.. miss ya!

katie said...

you and me together babe! i'm also at my highest weight ever. not fun. stay strong, and give me a call next time the nestles craving comes around.

lovies

jenna marie said...

i just want to say that i'm fat. the fattest i have ever been. i have rolls in places i didn't used to and i'm the biggest fattest COW. i probably have gained 10 pounds since last summer. i blame it on the miscarriage and the endless 'am i pregnant?' but that's no excuse right? lets come up with an exercise plan i'll join you. why does it feel so good to tell my bloggie friend all my deepest darkest? i dont know but i like it.

Dad said...

Well, little one, you are just like your dad.....always setting goals. I like your hair short too, or at least not long. Write down what you eat each day. You really do know what to do....you just got to do it. JUST DO IT!!!! I have been trying to work out more too....always seem to start around Hilton Head time. Let me know how I can help.

Love you...Dad

Zach and Katie Hillstead said...

can i join you in your self-reform club? let's be hot together:)

SJ said...

Tu esi ridiculous!! I say love all parts of life, including the cheese....think of the good cheese in lithuania with bacon. You know what's funny, I am at one of my lowest weights and I eat everything, I just love to ride my bike. So, it all works out. But no matter what you say, you are the prettiest and skinniest person I have ever met...ha ha ha

Love you

SJ

Shauna said...

Hi Jenna & Jake -- I just got on your blog and it's amazing. I haven't gone through the whole thing -- just read Jenna's comments about how she's feeling at the moment and just want you to know Jenna that I feel exactly the same -- I'm at a low point with the weight even though there's more of me to love. Just know you're beautiful in every way. I just love you guys and hope Jake is feeling better. I was up in Seattle when you were there to see Jenye. I bet you had a great time. Take care, Shauna

The Young Family Inc. said...

If anyone is gonna put their mind to something and follow thru- it is you Nen-na!! Even though I think you are amazing as is!! Just remember- 10% 40% 50%. Ha ha. 10 percent of the time eat. 40 percent of the time binge and 50 percent of the time purge. Wait, that wasn't it!!!
PS Look at what Aja said on my blog when I said you were an angel!!
PSS Today was hell. I REALLY missed you!!!!!!!!!!

The Aprecios said...

I could seriously copy this post, and use it as my own. I have always been skinny, never had to worry about what I ate or anything. But once I got married, I started putting on the pounds. I changed nothing but a little weight to my ring finger (and sex) :) Maybe thats too personal to come from someone you dont know, sorry! I know Jake though if that makes you feel better (my little brothers friend)

Anyway, I love that I am not the only one putting on a little poundage, and good luck with all the new ideas. PS-I found out that because I have low progesterone, it causes weight gain - maybe thats worth looking into!

Paige and Garrett said...

Jenna, I hope you remember me - Katie's friend you met a year or so ago right when you came home from your mission. Anyway, I'm going to add my two cents to this post. Believe me, you'll feel SOO good after working out and eating right. Of course you know that or you wouldn't restrict yourself from that yummy cheese (that'd be the hardest for me). But good luck and no excuses! As for the growing your hair out thing, I'm doing the same thing and am also in the nasty stage. Your cute bangs inspired me to cut my bangs (which got the cutting urge out of me) and keep growing the rest of my hair. Thanks!

Tyler and Anne said...

You are beautiful!! But most importantly, I know that you are fun to be around, kind, happy, sweet to your husband, smart and so many other things... and I don't know you that well! Get through this week (and your period if you are on it.. which wouldn't be surprising...) and smile. You look great.

Lixi said...

Jenna
I really like reading your blog. You seem to have such a fun life. Your hubby is super cute too. good for you! You guys sound like you are doing well and having a great summer. Good luck with your goals. Remember volleyball when we could work out everyday doing something fun and not just running? Those were the days... anyway, talk to you soon!
Alixa

lauren ann said...

I love you Jenna Vela... you crack me up. I decided yesterday that I was going to stop eating unnatural sugar- I had a cookie for breakfast. Hopefully you are better than me at sticking to you goals:)

PS I was just looking at Thai pics. Good times

big willy style said...

goals shmoals...
whatever happened to wendy's fries and baked potatoes all in one drive thru run? and then back an hour later for a cheese burger. now THOSE were the days. agf